James 1:5 says,
But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.
Multiple places in the Bible tell us to seek wisdom and understanding. For example, this same sentiment is also expressed in Proverbs 2.
Over the course of this past year, I have needed lots of wisdom.
It started when I married the love of my life, and together we moved south. I’m a romantic at heart and love to plan date nights, meals, and movie ventures. With the possibility of new adventures, the first few months and the summer disappeared quickly with the southern heat and fireflies. However, life became much more difficult as I applied for and started teaching at a new school. We found my career and time together often conflicted. On occasion, Nelson would help me by alphabetizing my papers or bringing home dinner on a busy night; however, this ultimately resulted in long talks about our future. Nelson knew I always wanted to publish but pursuing this passion would be impossible for me with teaching. This was now evident. While these discussions continued, Nelson began considering new career options for himself. He wanted to be at a location for several years. Somewhere he could learn and grow, and maybe even somewhere that he would stay. This resulted in lots of prayer, discussions about moving, and ultimately job interviews states away. God continued to answer prayers. Nelson accepted a job not far from my parents’ house.
When summer approached, I resigned my position, packed up our home, and prepared for the move. My parents came down, took our belongings, our giant dog, and a loaded car. Nelson left a week or two later to begin work, leaving me for two weeks to finish up school. Within the month, we had decided I should pursue publishing my book, and our house hunt began.
We are still not settled by any means. We remain in limbo, patiently seeking out a house, preparing for this next year, and discussing what steps need to be taken for me to pursue a potentially new career. Our lives are busy, but I don’t think we’re the only ones that feel the chaos pressing in from all directions at times. I think so many of you in the mundane of every day life feel it too. And in those moments, sometimes I think, God, I need so much more wisdom than I have. I am tired. I feel like I’m drowning in the middle of the ocean. Where do you want me?
There are some things that are so evident to me about God. One, is that He cares. The Bible tells us that if we ask, He promises to give us wisdom and discernment. God cares for those that are broken. It is okay to fall at His feet when you don’t have all the answers. God understands your heart deeper than anyone, the last thing He wants us to do is place Him on the back-burner during life’s busiest moments. Instead, He wants us to seek Him for help.
I love those who love me; And those who diligently seek me will find me.